A reminder

I’m here

I’m existing

Through life you will forget who you are

You will create yourself many times

And then recreate yourself twice as many times

You’ll say you’ve forgotten who you used to be, but you know that’s a lie. You know deep down that you’ve been carrying that baggage since it arrived.

My insecurities do not define me. They shape who I am. They allow me to flourish in a world of hurt–a world where everyone is different yet everyone is trying to prove that their way of different is better than your way of different.

Can someone carry me out of this abyss?

I look up and no one is there. Except further up, I see a mirror and remember that I must pull myself out of this well that I willingly dropped into.

Do not forsake my past, and do not forsake who I am in the present, and most importantly, I will not forsake who I may become in the future.

A reminder to be thankful of your life comes at least once a year in Holiday form. But gratitude is not something that should be shown once a year. Instead, I need to be grateful for this existence. For my friends. For my family. For myself. For this Earth. For this world.

Be Grateful for love. For hurt, for sorrow, for joy, for success, for failure. Be grateful for the tightrope of life because you know that there is also a safety net down below. And if there isn’t, please build one.

This is a reminder.

A reminder that the voice inside your head reading this means you exist.

It means you have the ability to be grateful for this existence. To continue walking that tightrope. To continue getting rejected by love and to relish instead in friendship, in family. To pull yourself out of that well. To being happy, to being accepted, to being.

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This is yours

Some experiences are meant to be for you only.

Those moments of deep thought and solitude? A brisk walk around a beautiful country? That beautiful sunrise at the top of the hill you climbed?

Maybe that moment is meant just for you. Maybe the stars aligned perfectly at that moment so only you could experience that beauty and serenity of the sun slowly changing colors across the landscape—so far yet you feel like you can grasp that beauty right in front of you. Maybe it’s best to put your phone away and instead of taking a picture to share with others, that you keep this moment just for yourself, like a beautiful secret.

And maybe you don’t have someone there to confirm this reality with you, but maybe what you experienced was a beauty that is outside of reality in the first place. These moments are the best because they will forever and solely be yours.

This memory… This is yours, yours alone. And it is beautiful.

Small Infinities

Today our Singapore troupe arrived on Bintan Island Resort, Indonesia

I sat on the beaches doing nothing in the afternoon

Just watching the waves shift

And the clouds drift

Watching these small infinities exist right in front of me

Isn’t it amazing

How we all carry within ourselves these small infinities?

Like our thoughts

And love

And possibilities

Like the way the clouds continually drift

We continually seek things to love

We continually seek possibilities and opportunities

We continually find within ourselves infinite thoughts of weird yet majestic concepts

You are infinite.


Grateful Day 34: I am grateful for a friend who is willing to accompany me on my adventures

Daily Magic Day 3: I performed magic today for a nice lady who worked at one of the recreation counters, named Yeni.

When I initially offered, she genuinely seemed excited and she gestured her other co-worker to come watch. I am always happy to see this type of enthusiasm, and was happy to see she enjoyed the magic.

I asked her what she thought about America and she told me she liked the people, because Americans were good people.

I also asked her about Singapore, and I’ll be honest, I don’t quite remember what she said. I still need to work on my interviewing skills.

She had only been in Indonesia for two years and previously lived in Singapore, and asked me if I was from Singapore

After telling her that I was Canadian, Yeni was not surprised because she noted that our accents were totally different. Isn’t it weird how we only notice other people’s accents, and not our own? Another post for that topic…

Let your demons out

stare at a wall in silence

meditate

be still

let all your demons come out

let your thoughts escape you and run circles

It’s okay

you may get scared

you may feel taunted and attacked

allow it to happen

allow yourself to freely think about the bad–and the good

let your demons out so they can no longer haunt you from the inside

you deserve better than to carry such toxicity around

and once you find peace in your stillness

Create Angels

Good Luck.


Grateful Day 30: I am grateful for being able to watch some quality Netflix shows with my roommates

(Still voting on what month challenge I should do for February. Click here to vote. 1) do magic every day for strangers or 2) jog every day)

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